Won’t Miss: People.  Now hold up before you get your panties in a bunch about this.  While there are lots of specific people that I will miss, Thailand is a country of contradictions.  They can be nice as pie while simultaneously talking smack to their friend about you (because they don’t think you understand them).  Sure, this happens at home, but we have recourse in our home countries where we speak the language and don’t have to worry about someone “losing face”.

I won’t miss getting stared at like I have a third arm.

I won’t miss people driving past shouting “Farang” at me (or hearing them say “Farang” to the person standing next to them like a Farang would do if we saw an elephant or something equally impressive and surprising).

I won’t miss the extreme lack of consideration for everyone around them in public situations (i.e. stopping at the top/bottom of the escalator when there are still people coming behind them or cutting lines if there is any daylight between you and the person ahead of you).

I won’t miss having to pay more for most things because I am a foreigner and, therefore, I must be wealthy.

Side Note: I mentioned before that I have never been in an accident.  This is true.  Doesn’t mean I haven’t been struck on my bike before. 

I had a woman throw open her car door into my bike while I was driving past (she was having an argument in the car with her manfriend and not paying attention).  No apology, no wei-ing, nothing.  Her manfriend reached across and promptly pulled the door shut while I checked my bike, looked daggers at them through the windshield, and treated them to a few choice gestures.

While going around a truck that was taking up most of the road (in what was probably a 10-point turn), I got backed over.  He was pulling forward.  I went behind him on the left. He threw it in reverse suddenly.  I had nowhere to go.  Leaned on the horn.  He didn’t stop.  I did.  He literally pushed me and my bike over.  Pulled forward to unpin me.  Did he get out of the truck or offer any sort of assistance or apologies?  Of course not.  Choice gestures on my part followed.

 

Miss: People.  While the farang community shifts from term to term and year to year, the Thai population remains pretty much the same.  Most of the ones I have formed relationships with give me food…

• There is Ali, my fried chicken guy. He has the best gai tod in Hat Yai.  Always hot and fresh and delicious and a little crispy on the outside.  And he likes to have a little conversation with me and either gives me something additional for free or a discount (and he throws in a little extra for the cats).
• Then we have the khao man gai (boiled chicken and rice) restaurant. I walk in, exchange greetings and smiles with the owner and his wife, get my glass of ice and sit down.  In minutes, a delicious plate of chicken on rice is brought to me with a bowl of hearty chicken broth and a sort of brown, ginger, chili sauce.  They have taken the time to observe that I don’t eat the cucumbers on the plate or the cilantro in the soup so they stopped adding them.
• Preow wan moo (sweet and sour pork) I obtain from a little hole in the wall restaurant near my school. You always come out smelling like you’ve been sitting around a campfire but the sweet and tender pork is worth it.  They always smile and confirm my standing order and giggle a little about it (since I always get the same thing).
• No one at TukTuk restaurant speaks any English, but no matter. My perpetual order of preow wan gai (sweet and sour chicken that doesn’t even remotely resemble any sweet and sour chicken I have ever had) is always prepared differently.  It doesn’t matter if I order it mai bpet (not spicy) because it will come as it comes, which also means with or without vegetables.  And when I go away traveling for extended periods, they always ask me where I have been and want details about the people and the country and the food.  It’s nice to be missed.
• Krua Khun (Your Kitchen) is probably my favorite Thai restaurant here. Small and quiet with a charming atmosphere created by the pond and trickling fountain.  The owner is the most adorable woman with a short “mom” haircut and glasses and a warm, genuine smile.  I used to always get the cashew chicken (which I can say in Thai but I’m not able to spell out in English) that is some of the best I’ve ever had.  Then I discovered that I can get khao pad massaman gai (massaman curry fried rice with chicken).  Instead of the potatoes that are usually in this dish when it is a bowl of curry, they substitute French fries in the fried rice version.  Love it.
• Chewing Tea is my favorite place to get cha kai mook (pearl milk tea). Back home, a bubble tea will usually run you around $6 and be kind of measly with just a smattering of tapioca pearls in it.  Here, it costs 35 baht ($1), is a large size, and has a generous portion of “bubbles”.  I often run out of tea before I get all the tapioca pearls.  And the woman who owns Chewing Tea is lovely.  Her husband is Filipino so she speaks really good English and always has conversations with me about weather and travel and what not.  But she always asks me questions in Thai first to help me practice and expand my vocabulary.  I appreciate that.
• My laundry lady. We always have conversations in a mixture of Thai and English (which I call Thanglish) and she asks where I’ve been and where I’m going and invites me to have food and beer with her and her friends.  She looks after me.  Made sure I had a proper face mask when the smoke from Sumatra was choking the population.  When she found out I was moving back home, she asked how much I was selling my bike for and told me she would keep an ear out for someone looking to buy.  I got her name 3 years ago when I started taking my clothes there, but forgot it.  And then I didn’t feel like I could ask again, because I should have known it already.  I always just call her “Pi”.  And she always calls me “Teacher”.  I recently found out that she ALSO didn’t know my name because she asked one of my friends what it was.  So, we’re even.

• My landlady, Goi. She is basically like an auntie to me.  I have spent the last 3 years living in her building and she is a big reason as to why I have stayed in this location.  When I go out of town, she looks after my bike (the batteries in automatics tend to die when they sit for a few days).  Sometimes she gives me rides to the airport.  Or fruit leftover from a Buddhist offering.  Or washes my curtains for me while I am in Vietnam.  Or looks over a receipt from a mechanic to make sure I didn’t get ripped off.  Or lets me basically adopt and feed a pregnant stray cat and then allows the kittens and mom to live in the courtyard (even though she doesn’t really like cats).  I’ve stayed in her building because it wasn’t like having a landlady who you just see when you pay the rent.  It was like having family.